23 April 2012

My awesome paleo bread balls!!

So I wanted hush puppies today... and garlic bread. I found at least 15 recipes for paleo bread, I had about three ingredients. So, I invented my own, and I cooked it in my cakeball machine.

2 cups almond meal
3/4 cup coconut milk (the kind you buy refrigerated, not canned)
1 egg
1 tsp salt
2 tsp baking powder
1 tbsp dried onion flakes
1 tbsp garlic powder

Combine dry ingredients and stir until everything is mixed. Add egg and milk. Whisk throughly. Now you are ready to stick them in your cakeball machine. :) (I suppose you could stick it in a bread pan and bake it)

22 April 2012

What being a sleep deprived crazy person taught me about my own parents

Well, I'm mostly a sleep deprived crazy person. :) I threatened my poor baby with death last night if he didn't go back to sleep. (Please, I was nowhere near serious or tired enough to inflict any actual harm upon my beautiful little boy.)

The back story:

Charlie has eczema, and for the last 3-4 weeks it has been terrible. His trunk and upper arms have been covered in oozing red clumps of nastiness. He's been off and on steroid cream and TONS of aquaphor. When he scratches, the oozing red clumps of nastiness start bleeding. (God bless his poor little soul.) The doctor said he cannot scratch at all, so when we see him scratching keep him on Benadryl. So, he's been on Benadryl pretty much every other night for about 3-4 weeks..... until 4 nights ago. The saga begins... DUN DUN DUN!!!! (queue music)

Wednesday:

6 AM: Charlie wakes up when Michael gets ready for work. Michael so graciously takes him until he leaves at 7:15 so I can sleep a little longer. :)

6:15: MA MA MA MA!!!!!!!!! *poke poke poke* *body slam* For realz yo. I'm not sleeping in.

8:00: Out for a run... sorta. Half a mile in, Charlie starts screaming like a mad man. I guess I'll just run later in the week.

10:00: Hallelujah it's nap time. Too bad Charlie didn't get the memo.

12:00PM: Shove some lunch in his mouth. Cheerios. I feel guilty that I didn't give him anything nutritious.

12:15: He falls asleep. :D JACKPOT!

12:45: He wakes up. boo.

1:00-4:30: This time is spent in a walking haze. Somehow, we both survive and are relatively healthy.

4:45: I'm laying on the floor contemplating the virtues of shipping him off to daycare for a while. Then, he crawls on top of me and falls asleep immediately. All thoughts of daycare are gone. My little boy is perfect. :)

5:30: The baby wakes up. I'm exhausted. It is one of those days that I plan on handing Charlie off to Michael as soon as he walks in the door, then I'm GONE! see ya. I get a call. Michael has a mandatory work dinner. Sigh.

8:30: Michael finally gets home. Charlie has been screaming for 2 hours.

9:00: Michael gets Charlie to sleep. All is well in the world again.

9:15: Michael and I are asleep. :)

12:00AM (THURSDAY): Seriously, I hear a crying baby?!

12:15-5:00AM: This entire time is spent in a walking coma. Seriously.

All of Thursday pretty much resembles Wednesday. We go to house church Thursday night. I'm listening to the lesson, but honestly, I don't hear a word. I'm half asleep.

This continues until Saturday night.

8:00 PM (SATURDAY): Charlie is asleep.

9:00: I'm asleep.

12:00 AM(SUNDAY): Charlie is not asleep.

2:00: This is not my finest parenting hour. I look at him and say loudly, "I swear. I brought you into this world. If you don't go to sleep, I'm gonna take you back out!"  He screams in what, at the time, I can only assume to be mortal terror, and I start crying HYSTERICALLY. Terrible mom award.

2:15: This is not my finest wife-y moment either. I wake Michael up, hand him Charlie, and go lay down on the couch.

3:00: Charlie is back asleep.

It is 12:30 on Sunday afternoon, and I'm pretty much rested. I'm looking at Charlie wondering how I could ever lose my temper with him. Before I had Charlie, I was under the delusion that parents should NEVER lose their temper. When they do, it is just a sign of their ridiculousness... like they can somehow be perfect all the time. I remember thinking, "They are older than me. It is their job to be nice all the time." HAHA. Looking back, I realize how ridiculous I was. When you live at home and/or don't have your own children it is possible to be semi-appreciative of your parents. It's nice when they give you money and buy you clothes. I don't think you truly appreciate them until you have your own children. You realize that every dollar they gave you came from their own spending money. You realize that every time they bought you a pair of jeans, that was one less pair of jeans they could buy for themselves. You realize that they didn't kill you when you were up 4 nights in a row for no reason. You realize that they didn't physically harm you when you were being an idiot teenager. :) 

19 April 2012

My Paleo Adventure

Today, Michael and I are starting our adventures into the Paleo lifestyle. I'm very excited about it, but I'm sure I won't be so excited the first 1000 times I have a craving for a chocolate milkshake.

The basic premise of the Paleo diet is that our bodies are designed to need fats, proteins, and carbs. Our bodies, however, have a hard time digesting certain foods. You avoid those foods: all grains, dairy, processed anything, and legumes. In essence Paleo is not a "low-carb" diet; it is just lower-carb than the average American diet. (which btw contains way more than the recommended amount of carbs) People have asked me, "What in the world will you eat?" I have to admit that the transition from my normal diet to Paleo isn't all that daunting. I already don't eat any dairy, the occasional delicious cheese excluded. In addition, my simple carbohydrate intake has been nearly cut in half since I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I found that after I delivered I was already used to eating less grains and sugars, so I never fully reverted back.

Without much ado, here is a list of the foods I plan on eating this week.... for my incredulous friends. :)

Breakfast this week: Hard-boiled eggs, fruit, leftovers from dinner. (I've never really liked "breakfast foods" anyway.)

Morning snack: Carrot sticks, tuna salad (paleo style), crab meat with mango/cilantro/peppers. (I sometimes skip this snack.)

Lunch: Butternut Squash soup, salad with veggies/nuts/dried fruit, leftovers from dinner.

Afternoon snack: Walnuts, almonds, dried fruit, fruit, celery with the tuna salad, banana with almond butter. (Sometimes I skip this too.)

Dinner: Salmon with a honey mustard dill glaze, baked zucchini, and butternut squash soup. Roasted chicken with roasted cabbage and steamed broccoli. Chicken and veggie soup. Pork Chops with a cranberry glaze and roasted kale chips. Homemade red sauce served over spaghetti squash.

Dessert: Baked apples, no sugar.

Splurge item: 1 pack of bacon. (Ideally, you are supposed to eat lean meats, but bacon isn't exactly a prohibited food.)

**I'm not doing this to lose weight, but that'll be an added bonus. It is claimed by many to help with a wide range chronic ailments such as : acne, headaches, sunburn, gastrointestinal problems, diabetes, obesity, fatigue, fibromyalgia, interstitial colitis, allergies, among many others.